ATLAS TRANSLATES

In his dream, he became Jing Lin again.

That perfect Jing Lin without any flaws, whose every movement seemed controlled by a specific program.

Like a mirror separating the two of them, he looked at himself in the mirror. Countless times he wanted to run away awkwardly, but “Jing Lin” followed him like an inescapable shadow.

“I’m not Jing Lin!”

“I’m not Jing Lin! I’m just Jing Yi!”

“You are.”

His reflection smiled slightly: “Because you are Jing Lin, you can have everything you have now.”

“Because you are Jing Lin, Shu He loves you.”

“No one would love Jing Yi.”

He fell awkwardly to the ground, trying to escape this terrifying dream, but suddenly plunged heavily back into that car accident—

His mother’s hysteria, the screeching brakes, the oncoming truck—”Bang!”

“Why are you so disobedient? If you had agreed to break up with her, would your mum have gone to find you herself?”

“Your mum and I should never have brought you into this world. You’ve caused so many deaths. Isn’t that enough?”

“Why couldn’t you just be our Jing Lin? How could you, how could you be so heartless?”

As if countless giant nets surrounded him, he couldn’t escape. He begged for someone to save him, but only Shu He could save him.

Shu He.

Shu He.

Shu He.

Only when he was with her did he have his own emotions.

Once, he loved hearing her call him Jing Yi, because only when she spoke his name was it not filled with disgust and coldness.

“Jing Yi, what right do you have to feel wronged?”

In the room with tightly closed curtains, he suddenly woke up, clutching his chest, breathing heavily. His whole body was trembling, with a thin layer of sweat on his forehead.

He knew Shu He wanted him to explain why he broke up with her.

But.

Shu He once said: “Jing Yi, I think you’re like spring that will never be desolate.”

“Why?”

“No darkness, sunshine everywhere, making people feel greedy for more.”

They once saw a cat sunbathing by the roadside. Originally alert and guarded, under the warm sun, it couldn’t help but open its belly, comfortable and content.

She loved spring, with its blooming flowers, but Shu He forgot that Jing Yi was allergic to pollen.

He was never spring.

He was actually cold and biting, her most hated winter, the winter when all beauty withers.

In winter, the only thing she ever said she wanted was a snowman.

That’s right, a snowman.

He wondered if Shu He had seen the snowman.

If she saw it, would she soften? Would he still have a chance?

Jing Yi struggled to prop himself up. He hesitated. At this time, Shu He should be back.

Was she still angry? Should he go out and apologise? The reason for breaking up… he struggled. What if, what if telling her made her hate him more…

But thinking about it, she already hated him, didn’t she?

If after telling her, she couldn’t accept it, then he could just hide again. Hide in a corner where no one could find him, hide himself away, and then no one would bother her.

But at the thought of her not wanting him, Jing Yi felt so sad that his nose stung and tears nearly burst forth. He raised his hand to press his eyelids, but a choked sob still rolled out uncontrollably.

When everything calmed down, he took a deep breath and slowly opened the door, but noticed something wasn’t right.

It was ten o’clock, and Shu He hadn’t returned.

He went to the woman’s room. It was empty and dark.

Jing Yi instantly became a bit panicked. Just as he was about to go back to his room for his mobile, his gaze involuntarily fell on the tightly closed glass door.

The wheelchair stopped slowly in front of the glass door, but he didn’t dare reach out to push it open.

The glass reflected the silent figure of the man sitting in the wheelchair. Separated by a door, outside was pitch black. A carrot had fallen to the ground, along with a few lonely twigs.

The strong wind blew, and the howling sound seeped through the door cracks.

Shu He hadn’t returned, and the snowman had melted.

—

Someone knocked twice on Shu He’s room, and Yao Qing entered, holding a plate of freshly cut fruit.

She looked somewhat cold, and Yao Qing awkwardly placed the fruit in front of her.

“Hehe, don’t be angry.”

Seeing her stiff appearance, Shu He felt a bit uncomfortable, but still didn’t lose her temper, just silently picking up a fork to eat the fruit.

“We’ve checked out the other party’s conditions with your dad, and they’re really quite good.”

Using the excuse of Yao Qing feeling unwell to trick her back, only to set her up on a blind date.

Yao Qing observed her expression and continued: “I know you’re unwilling, but Hehe, your dad and I are already old. When we’re gone in the future, what will you do?”

Shu He tugged at her lip. Yao Qing knew that because of what happened in her childhood, she resented them, but…

Yao Qing’s eyes also reddened a bit. She took her hand: “Hehe, your dad and I are first-time parents, and inevitably did things wrong. We know you’re still angry, but now, we truly want you to have a good life.”

Shu He found it ironic. Looking at Yao Qing’s wrinkled hands, some words stuck in her throat. She knew she shouldn’t say them, but she couldn’t help it.

“Then why didn’t you prepare better before having me? Oh—”

“I forgot.” She let out a light laugh, but her clear eyes were obviously cold.

“You wanted to abort me back then, but just couldn’t.”

Shu He looked like her, with gentle features, but now, Yao Qing’s heart felt like it was bleeding.

She wanted to say more, but Shu He didn’t want to listen.

After she left, the bedroom fell into silence. She pulled open the curtains. The snow was still falling, and the vast whiteness was somewhat dazzling.

In her mind, the small snowman appeared.

When she left, she saw the snowman on the balcony. Its carrot nose had fallen to the ground, and the twigs were crooked, almost melting.

She instantly knew who had built the snowman, and why he built it.

Shu He was an accident in Yao Qing and Shu Hua’s lives.

Her arrival wasn’t a surprise to either of them, but a shock and burden.

At that time, they had just graduated and never thought about marriage. They almost unhesitatingly decided to abort her.

But when both sets of parents found out, they disagreed and suggested they might as well get married.

For Yao Qing and Shu Hua, it was like suddenly pressing the accelerator of life, being forced to welcome her arrival.

Shu He was premature and born with poor health, always falling ill. For the newly graduated couple with no savings, this was a huge expense, and they could only rely on parental help.

They had a child but were unwilling to give up their own vibrant world. They didn’t know how to raise a child, and the endless giving deepened the resentment and quarrels in this family.

Perhaps knowing she was already a burden, Shu He seldom cried as a child. She was always well-behaved.

She had heard them say, “When will this end? We shouldn’t have given birth to her. Maybe next time, let’s not treat her?”

She didn’t hear her mum’s answer, but in her naivety, she just innocently thought that she wasn’t good enough, which was why they had such thoughts.

Until one snowy day, they took her home from the hospital. Yao Qing held her hand, and Shu Hua stood on her right. Both remained silent the whole way.

Other children were building snowmen and having snowball fights. She watched enviously but didn’t speak up.

Because mum had said that her health was poor and she couldn’t catch cold.

But unexpectedly, Shu Hua crouched down, and there was an emotion in the man’s deep eyes that she couldn’t understand.

“Xiao He, do you want to build a snowman?”

They rarely asked what she wanted, but she was still just a child, and nodded in line with her heart’s desire.

Seeing her daughter’s porcelain-white, obedient little face, Yao Qing could no longer hold back and turned away.

Shu He didn’t understand what was wrong with mum, but Shu Hua blocked her view and said: “Then Hehe, build a snowman here today.”

She tilted her head, her clear eyes confused: “Didn’t mum say I would catch a cold?”

“Today is different.” Shu Hua rubbed her head and forced himself to say: “On the last day of each year, if you can see a snowman, then we’ll all be safe and sound in the coming year.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

At that time, she completely believed her parents. She smiled, still with a nasal tone: “Then I’ll build three, so that dad, mum, and I will all be safe and healthy.”

Yao Qing covered her mouth. Shu He looked at her with concern, but Shu Hua wouldn’t let her go over.

“How about you build snowmen here, and dad and mum will come back after finishing work?”

Shu He was very sensible, knowing they had to work. She nodded obediently, watching them leave without looking back.

At that time, she naively thought they would come back.

She built three small snowmen by herself. While waiting for her parents to return, she silently encouraged herself to exercise well in the future, stay healthy, and build bigger snowmen for her parents.

But this wait lasted two hours.

She was frozen stiff, and her parents never came to get her.

In the unfamiliar environment, with no familiar faces, she could only wipe her tears, anxiously searching for Yao Qing and Shu Hua.

During this time, she encountered a drunk homeless man on the road.

Mum had said to stay far away when meeting such people. She was terrified and, while trying to move away, she accidentally fell and slid straight into the river.

If there hadn’t been a cleaner nearby, six-year-old Shu He might have died in that cold lake.

After being rescued, she was unconscious for several days.

If she hadn’t just left the hospital, and if the doctor who had treated her hadn’t recognised her, the hospital wouldn’t have been able to contact Yao Qing and Shu Hua.

After waking up and seeing her parents, Shu He broke down crying. She struggled, wanting her mum to hug her.

Yao Qing finally couldn’t hold back. With red eyes, she held her in her arms. She couldn’t bear it in the end.

Shu He seemed to realise she had been abandoned. She cried so hard she could barely breathe: “Dad, mum, please… please don’t leave me.”

“I’m scared… it’s so dark, so cold.”

“I’ll be good, I won’t get sick anymore, don’t leave me…”

At that time, she was only six years old.

Yao Qing’s tears, Shu Hua’s silence, and then the arrival of her grandparents, the noise and accusations – Shu He was caught in the middle and cried for a long time.

She thought that as she grew older, childhood events would fade, but Shu He remembered them more and more clearly. At that time, they truly decided to abandon her.

Raising a child costs a lot of money. Throughout her growth, she often heard Yao Qing and Shu Hua arguing, more or less because of her.

As if afraid of being abandoned again, she became increasingly sensible.

She learned to endure discomfort, exercise, and tried hard to become capable in every way, striving not to be a burden to her family or others.

When studying, she didn’t dare to slack off.

In high school, she was the only one who had made it there from a small place. Despite her excellent grades, she never dared to relax.

Born among moss, some people treated her like mud. But it didn’t matter, she would bloom eventually.

Everyone might abandon her, but she would never abandon herself.

As for that winter when she was six.

She stayed safe and sound because she worked hard at exercising and took great care of her health.

And that snowman? It only froze her childhood.

That casually made-up story to trick her – perhaps Yao Qing and Shu Hua had already forgotten.

When drunk, she murmured about the snowman, but Jing Yi remembered it until now.

Shu He casually scrolled through her phone, yet found herself thinking back to that night, his utterly wronged questioning.

This guy, would he cry in secret again?

Not even a single message.

Shu He didn’t think she was concerned about him. What if he died at home? She, as his roommate, might be implicated.

Only because of this.

She messaged Liang Xu, who quickly agreed to go to the house to find him.

In the evening, Shu He still went to dinner with her parents.

Seeing her indifferent expression, Shu Hua couldn’t help but say a few words.

It was all about how good the other party’s conditions were, asking her to smile more later and give the other person some face.

She found his enthusiasm ironic.

Shu Hua was originally a company manager. After being made redundant, he finally noticed he had a daughter.

After graduation, Shu He stayed in Li Tang and didn’t return. They had visited her, and perhaps seeing their daughter struggling alone to maintain the shop was too hard, they finally learned to care for her.

They also became like other parents, nagging, always telling her to take care of herself, to wear more clothes.

But their concern, their love, was nearly twenty years too late.

Shu He felt like an outsider. She didn’t know if they truly wanted to be good to her, or if they felt guilty and wanted to make amends.

But none of it mattered anymore.

They gave birth to her; they would always be her parents, but that was all. If they expected her to act like daughters in ordinary families, to be coquettish and obedient, Shu He couldn’t do it.

At the restaurant, the other party’s parents had already arrived. Standing behind them was a man wearing a finely tailored black suit, his shirt buttoned impeccably, exuding the aura of an elite professional from head to toe.

Shu He’s smile was faint. As she followed Yao Qing to nod at the other party, before sitting down, the man gentlemanly came over to pull out her chair.

Shu Hua and Yao Qing’s eyes revealed satisfaction, but Shu He just calmly said thank you.

Most of the time, it was the parents talking. Occasionally when the conversation turned to the two of them, she calmly and patiently answered questions, but without being too enthusiastic.

Gradually, she became a bit distracted, her gaze often falling on her phone.

When the meal ended, Shu He went to the restroom.

She casually looked at her phone. Liang Xu hadn’t replied to her message, giving her a bad feeling.

“Shu He.”

The man’s deep voice, like a cello, interrupted her thoughts. Shu He’s phone was still lit up. She raised her eyes, her expression calm: “What is it?”

“Your parents and my parents went downstairs first.”

Tang Yun still had his dark coat hanging on his right arm, his demeanour distinguished and noble.

Shu He nodded, not showing much reaction: “All right.”

They entered the lift together. With no one else around, the atmosphere felt overly quiet.

“Mr Tang.”

Shu He spoke first. Tang Yun’s black eyes were like an abyss that couldn’t be seen to the bottom. He looked at the beautiful but somewhat aloof woman in front of him and said gently: “You can just call me Tang Yun.”

Shu He paused, putting on a very faint but polite smile: “Tang Yun, I came to today’s dinner to accompany my parents.”

Between adults, there was no need to say much. Tang Yun smiled lightly: “It seems I’ve failed badly, being rejected after just one meal.”

“It’s not because of you.” Shu He still explained: “I currently have no plans to marry. I’m really sorry, please explain this to your parents when you go back. I’ll also make it clear to my parents.”

She wore a beige coat today, hands in her pockets, calm and peaceful, like an elegant, proud lily.

Tang Yun suppressed his interest and was about to say something when he saw her suddenly answer a phone call. Her expression changed abruptly after hearing something—

Liang Xu’s heavy voice made Shu He feel a vague ringing in her ears: “Jing Yi is missing.”