After staying in the hospital for a while, Qi Lan returned home to recuperate.
She had lost a lot of weight and even lifting her arms was difficult, let alone doing heavy work. Feng Ning took over all the household chores. She also found an exercise routine online, drew it on paper, and accompanied her mother in doing it.
Feng Ning resumed her normal school life, attending classes during the day and returning home at night. Qi Lan had to go to the hospital regularly for treatment.
Sometimes when she couldn’t sleep at night, Feng Ning would search online about how long people could live after breast cancer metastasis. Many answers said that current medical treatments could control breast cancer well, and it was one of the most treatable malignant tumors.
She needed to read these things to fall asleep, then wake up the next day full of energy to tell Qi Lan, “Experts say the mortality rate for breast cancer isn’t high. Western countries treat it like a chronic disease. The most important thing is to stay relaxed and not overthink things.”
Every time she heard this, Qi Lan would smile and say, “Yes, Mom’s feeling much better lately, and my appetite has improved too.”
Feng Ning was clever and resourceful, though far from being a genius. Her strength was her ability to endure hardship, more than most people.
The family couldn’t afford to hire a caretaker, so after school, Feng Ning would take the bus home, buy groceries on the way, and cook for her mother. Then she would exercise with her, take a shower, and go to her room to study. After studying for a few hours, she would cut some fruit, spend time talking with Qi Lan, and continue studying after her mother fell asleep.
The time spent commuting between school and home meant Feng Ning had to cut back on sleep. She would sleep at 1 AM, wake up at 6 AM, and take a half-hour nap in the classroom during lunch.
Life was busy, but as long as her mother was there, Feng Ning was content.
During the final exams of the first semester of sophomore year, when the results came out, many students crowded around the top 100 rankings board, including Jiang Wen. He saw his name had moved to second place.
As for Feng Ning, she had climbed from outside the top fifty to claim first place:
- Class 9, Grade 1 – Feng Ning
- Class 9, Grade 1 – Jiang Wen
Behind the glass, just these two lines in black text on blue background. Low murmurs could be heard nearby:
“The top three in our grade are from Class 9 again, those two super scholars.”
“Feng Ning and Jiang Wen, why is it always them? Are they conjoined twins or something?”
“Yeah, those two, they’re like yin and yang.”
“…”
The two of them. Feng Ning and Jiang Wen. Them. They were together.
Jiang Wen felt a strange, secret satisfaction.
He found it odd, but he liked how others mentioned him and Feng Ning together.
— In others’ eyes, it seemed like they were a pair, together.
After staring for a long while, he heard a familiar teasing voice: “Hey, Jiang Wen, I’m above you again.”
Controlling his excess emotions, Jiang Wen turned his head.
She had a slight smile, her hand curved to shield her eyes from the bright sunlight.
He gave a soft “mm.”
Feng Ning said: “Am I amazing or what?”
Jiang Wen said: “Not bad.”
“How does it feel to be back in your familiar second place?”
“Pretty good.”
“?”
After a year of rivalry, this was the first time Jiang Wen had responded so calmly. Feng Ning turned to look at him in confusion, feeling somewhat disappointed. “No fun anymore. Your skin has gotten so thick from my teasing that I can’t get to you easily now.”
“Feng Ning…”
“What?”
“I think…”
“Hmm?”
Jiang Wen paused, not continuing, “Nothing, I’m leaving.”
Before Feng Ning could react, he had already turned to leave. She called out to his back: “Young master, remember to study hard during the break!”
Jiang Wen didn’t look back, just raised his hand proudly.
I think… Compared to being first place alone… Being second place with you makes me happier.
After summer break, at the start of sophomore year, a new batch of students enrolled. As an exemplary student representative of Grade 10, Feng Ning gave a speech in the small auditorium to the new students.
Looking at the packed crowd below, she remained composed. Adjusting the microphone, just like that time at the flag-raising ceremony, she began, “Good afternoon teachers and students. Let me introduce myself briefly.”
“I’m Feng Ning from Class 9, Grade 2. I’m a classmate to half of you here, and a senior to the other half. After my speech today, I might become a role model to all of you.”
This brazen opening brought laughter from below.
Shuang Yao was recording her with her phone.
Xi Gaoyuan clapped along with others, saying to Zhao Binlin, “Feng Ning really hasn’t changed at all, still so arrogant.”
“She’s the most bizarre person I’ve ever met.”
Hearing others’ comments about Feng Ning, Jiang Wen smiled inwardly.
“Before assigning me this speech task, the teacher specifically instructed me not to mess around. She wanted me to speak from personal experience, from small details, about the school’s various advantages and characteristics, and to show a sense of belonging throughout.”
“Chinese people value subtlety. The teacher also said that when writing the speech, I must be tactful. First praise myself a little, but the main point must be praising the school. I know you won’t buy this, because I don’t either.”
The Iron Lady’s face turned green with anger.
This time, the audience responded not just with applause, but with whistles and cheers. Feng Ning had stirred up a small sensation at today’s opening ceremony.
She just had that kind of charisma. The kind that made people listen attentively.
Just like last time, originally distracted audience members perked up their ears after laughing, waiting for her next words.
After the applause died down, Feng Ning continued: “In ‘The Crowd’, it says that when people are in groups, their thinking becomes simple and they’re easily influenced by slogans. But all of that is fake, perfunctory, and meaningless.”
“Let me give an example. A year ago, someone stood in this same position as a new student representative. What did they say?”
Feng Ning imitated: “Life is a journey of struggle. From this moment on, let us embrace the spirit of perseverance and write a beautiful tomorrow for Qide together.”
This time it was Jiang Wen’s face that turned green. — He was that new student representative
“See, that speech was very positive, right? Very inspiring, right? But except for me, probably no one remembers it.”
Most people laughed again.
Feng Ning became serious, “He said life is a journey of struggle. But I want to say, life is a tragedy, including me – we all live in tragedy.”
“I’ve encountered many terrible things. I’ve wandered in valleys of despair, even felt hopeless about this messed-up life. But I still strive to live. Yes, I am someone who strives to live. No matter what happens, I will keep striving to live.”
The simplest words carried the most power. Below, there was complete silence. Even Jiang Wen was no longer annoyed. Like everyone else, he began to listen admiringly, attentively to her speech.
Zhao Binlin, sitting nearby, accidentally glanced at Jiang Wen and suddenly felt something strange.
He recalled Jiang Wen’s eyes and expression.
Zhao Binlin thought, why did he see a hint of… obsession in them?
Obsession?
“Nietzsche has a saying — I want you to observe yourself from a distant perspective.”
Feng Ning spoke word by word, her deep voice carrying through the speakers to every corner of the auditorium, “A broad perspective always dilutes tragedy. If we climb high enough, we’ll reach a height where tragedy no longer seems tragic.”
“When you open your eyes and discover life’s tragedies, realize its hardships — that’s your starting point for success.”
“I hope that what I’m saying here today can be a gift for your sixteen-year-old selves.”
After these words, there was at least ten seconds of complete silence.
Then thunderous applause erupted, lasting for a long time.
But Feng Ning wasn’t finished.
She leaned on both sides of the podium, casually continuing: “Finally, I want to return to the essence of this speech. What is the essence? It’s what the teacher instructed me to focus on — Qide is far more excellent, grand, and inclusive than you imagine.”
“Why?”
Feng Ning smiled, concluding, “Because it educated and tolerates students like me.”
Amidst the most enthusiastic applause, she said: “—Welcome to Qide High School.”
Feng Ning’s speech later became the most classic new student representative speech at Qide, never surpassed. Even long, long afterward, legends of her remained.
Another summer was ending.
Life wasn’t such a big deal, everything would pass, everything would be fine.
On an ordinary, sunny afternoon, Feng Ning returned home.
“Mom, I’m home—”
The house was quiet, so quiet that Feng Ning froze in place.
Schopenhauer wrote in his book that fate always tells people this truth: everything that happens must happen, it’s inevitable.
After seven rounds of chemotherapy, it still spread to the bones. Qi Lan had collapsed at home.
Qi Lan had been hiding it from Feng Ning.
So she didn’t know that Qi Lan’s condition had become so terrible.
The ambulance came, stopping at the entrance of Yujiang Lane. After taking her to the hospital, the doctor told Feng Ning to prepare for the worst outcome.
Looking at her mother connected to the ventilator, she nearly broke down, demanding: “If she was this serious, why didn’t anyone tell me before?”
“Your mother said you were still in school.”
“What does being in school have to do with it? I’m my mother’s family member. Why did you help the patient hide this from family?”
Doctor: “Actually, your mother wasn’t very cooperative with treatment. She refused many of our treatment plans.”
“Why?”
“The patient’s exact words were that she didn’t want to waste money lying in the hospital and drain the family’s savings,” the doctor said flatly. “Your mother wanted to leave some money for you, to feel more at peace when she goes. We had no right to interfere with her decision.”
“Then…” Feng Ning maintained her last bit of composure. Each word was difficult to speak. After a long pause, she asked, “If we treat it properly now, how long can she live at most?”
“Six months to a year.”
The doctor left.
Shuang Yao watched heartbrokenly as Feng Ning crouched on the ground. She went over, “Ning Ning…”
Feng Ning trembled slightly, hugging her knees, burying her face, “Don’t comfort me, no need, it’s fine, it’s fine.”
It’s fine.
What kind of person was Feng Ning?
She was a strong person.
When Qi Lan relapsed for the second time, Feng Ning had already mentally prepared herself.
So, she wasn’t terrified of Qi Lan’s death. Not terrified. Just afraid, Afraid she had wasted so much time, Afraid she hadn’t spent enough time with her.
Feng Ning took Qi Lan’s documents and went to Qide to withdraw from school.
She came alone and left alone.
Without saying goodbye to anyone.
Walking out of the school gates, Feng Ning looked back one more time.
The blue sky, white clouds, crisp autumn air. The class bell rang, and the school was still as lively as ever. Boys chased and played in the hallways during breaks, girls linked arms and shared secrets with blushing faces.
Everything was beautiful.
No one noticed one person was missing, no one cared that one person was gone.
Perhaps… someone did care.
Feng Ning thought of Jiang Wen.
She smiled slightly, then hailed a taxi and left.
At the hospital, Meng Hanmo handed her a card, “There’s 200,000 in here. Focus on your studies, don’t worry about money.”
Qi Lan needed treatment and they couldn’t do without money, so Feng Ning didn’t refuse. She said: “Brother, I’ll pay you back in the future.”
Meng Hanmo frowned, “When will you go back to school?”
Feng Ning gave the same answer: “I need to stay with my mom.”
“It’s almost senior year, you’re taking a break from school now, won’t you regret it?”
“No regrets.”
In the quiet hospital corridor at night, her voice was clear: “Even if long into the future, if you let me choose again, I would do exactly the same thing I’m doing now.”
Perhaps Feng Ning was too greedy.
Still hoping to borrow a few more years, to let Qi Lan watch her grow up safely.
But she couldn’t accompany her mother much longer. So now, even a minute or a second, she had to cherish deeply.
Even if she would be alone in the future, it didn’t matter.
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