Feng Ning remained motionless. Her expression cycled through hesitation, panic, and wariness before finally settling into indifference.
She turned back and walked forward.
He took a few steps to catch up, moving to block her path.
After a few seconds of standoff, Feng Ning tried to walk around him.
Jiang Wen caught her arm, urgently pulling her to a stop.
After struggling unsuccessfully to break free, Feng Ning stared at Jiang Wen with a detached expression. “What do you want?”
Jiang Wen looked at her, feeling every nerve being twisted. “Your… hands, are they injured?”
His words struck like a sharp blow, hitting her heart with sudden force. Her mind buzzed, and hatred instantly flared in Feng Ning’s eyes. She couldn’t help but laugh coldly as she twisted her wrist and yanked her hand back, her voice harsh: “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Surprised by her strong reaction, Jiang Wen stepped back.
Feng Ning calmly stared back at him: “Who told you?”
“The doctor.”
Hearing this answer, Feng Ning paused briefly, her mind quickly processing. “You heard it when you helped me with the forms just now?”
Seeing Jiang Wen nod, Feng Ning finally understood what had happened. She felt somewhat frustrated – she had almost given herself away just then. Within minutes, her expression returned to normal. She said, “The injury on my hands happened two years ago in an accident. I was cut by falling glass.”
“An accident?”
Feng Ning’s expression remained unchanged. “Yes, my entire arm was cut.” She found an excuse for her earlier outburst, “Though it’s not a big deal, the scars it left are quite ugly. I’m quite conscious about my appearance, so I don’t usually show them to others.”
Jiang Wen: “Was it serious?”
“Just some surface wounds. They look scary but aren’t serious.”
He was silent for a moment before murmuring, “So that’s what happened.”
When she spoke again, Feng Ning’s tone had softened considerably. “Yes, what else could it be?”
She seemed to be holding back laughter: “The way you acted just now, anyone would think I was about to jump off a building.”
Jiang Wen also relaxed. “You could have just said so. Why such a big reaction?”
“You’re the one who suddenly wanted to see my scars. Of course I’d be angry,” Feng Ning rolled her eyes. “Haven’t you heard of boundaries between men and women?”
“What a temper you have.”
After their brief, harmless bickering, a taxi stopped nearby.
Feng Ning opened the door and got in first. After sitting down, she noticed Jiang Wen still standing there. She asked, “What’s wrong, aren’t you going home?”
Jiang Wen said, “You go ahead, I have something else to do.”
Feng Ning closed the car door.
As the taxi drove away and turned a corner, Jiang Wen quickly became a distant figure.
From a line, to a dot.
Feng Ning leaned back in her seat, silently looking out the window. Having dropped her earlier lighthearted expression, her emotions remained in turmoil.
About the past, anyone else could know, it didn’t matter, but not Jiang Wen.
Not Jiang Wen.
She didn’t want him to know that beneath her intact exterior, her heart had long since corroded and rusted.
Shuang Yao spent two days playing in Shanghai before returning to Nan City. The day before New Year’s Eve, she suddenly received a phone call.
“Hello, is this Shuang Yao?”
Unable to recognize the voice, she answered: “Yes, I’m Shuang Yao. Who is this?”
There was silence on the other end.
Shuang Yao felt confused. When the other party remained silent, she checked her phone – it was a Shanghai number.
The voice finally replied: “This is Jiang Wen.”
Shuang Yao was stunned. “Jiang Wen?”
He explained: “Feng Ning’s former friend.”
“Oh, oh, oh, I remember, I remember.” She quickly caught on, “You’re calling because…?”
“I want to ask you about Feng Ning.”
After a moment of silence, he added, “If possible, please don’t tell Feng Ning.”
After hanging up, Jiang Wen told his assistant: “Help me book a flight to Nan City.”
“When?”
“Today.”
Jiang Wen recalled Feng Ning’s expression from that night.
Though he felt his suspicions were absurd, once certain thoughts take root, they grow wild like weeds.
Shuang Yao never imagined there would be a day when Jiang Wen would ask to meet her alone. It felt almost like a dream.
Worried about embarrassing Feng Ning, she went home after work specifically to tidy herself up.
Just before leaving, while changing her shoes, Shuang Yao paused, suddenly remembering something.
The meeting was set for seven-thirty in the evening. She deliberately arrived ten minutes early.
However, someone was there even earlier.
From several steps away, she could see Jiang Wen sitting quietly, lost in thought.
Shuang Yao approached and politely greeted him before sitting opposite him.
Jiang Wen asked: “What would you like to drink?”
“No trouble necessary, just water is fine.” Shuang Yao put her bag aside.
They had little connection and nothing to make small talk about. Shuang Yao got straight to the point: “What did you want to ask about Feng Ning?”
Jiang Wen remained silent.
Shuang Yao noticed his expression seemed off.
She tried to lighten the mood, “…Don’t scare me, did Feng Ning borrow a million from you and run away?”
Jiang Wen managed a forced smile.
After a moment, he vaguely said: “Feng Ning’s hands, she…”
Shuang Yao was surprised, blinking: “You know about that?”
Jiang Wen paused, acting casual: “Yes, she told me.”
Shuang Yao looked slightly confused, “…Then what did you want to ask me about?”
Jiang Wen probed: “Why did it happen?”
“Didn’t Feng Ning tell you?”
Jiang Wen slowly fiddled with his glass, looking at her, “She didn’t say much.”
Shuang Yao looked uncomfortable, “About her depression, I shouldn’t say too much. Feng Ning doesn’t like people talking about it. For details, you should ask her yourself.”
Jiang Wen’s hands stopped moving, as if stunned.
Shuang Yao didn’t notice his reaction, “Besides, she doesn’t really talk about these things with me either.”
Jiang Wen: “…How long has she been like this?”
“That? A long time now, since before the college entrance exam. I’m not completely sure, but it should have been after her mother passed away. Those times were really tough, but she’s been better these past few years. She rarely relapses now.”
Jiang Wen had vaguely guessed the answer before. But hearing Shuang Yao’s confirmation hit him hard, like someone had punched a hole in his chest.
It hurt.
His throat tightened, and he barely found his voice, “So that was… right when we broke up?”
“Around then, it was pretty serious at that time.”
Shuang Yao looked at him, hesitating before continuing, “Actually, I don’t know what happened between you two back then, why you broke up. Feng Ning was in a really bad state at that time. We argued many times, and I didn’t dare ask her about you, but I think she never really got over you… that’s why she hasn’t been with anyone else all these years.”
She observed Jiang Wen for a moment.
He seemed dazed… unable to hide his disappointment.
Shuang Yao, as if making up her mind, pulled some papers from her bag, “Oh right, these things – Feng Ning threw them away back then, but I picked them up from the trash and kept them for her.”
“Actually, before coming here, I was unsure whether I should give these to you. I wasn’t sure if I was overstepping. Because what happened between you two was so long ago, and I’m just Feng Ning’s friend, not her. I shouldn’t really be interfering in her love life.”
Shuang Yao leaned forward slightly, placing the crumpled papers in front of Jiang Wen.
She said: “But… as an observer, you know what they say – those involved can’t see clearly, but observers can? You came all the way to Nan City to find me, and neither of you seems to have moved on. So… I think maybe, just maybe, there’s still a chance for you two.”
Jiang Wen: “Thank you.”
“Ah, no need for thanks. It hasn’t been easy for either of you. Keep these things.” Shuang Yao picked up her bag and stood. “I have something else to do later, so I’ll head out first.”
At the door, for some reason, Shuang Yao paused and looked back at Jiang Wen.
He was still sitting in the same position.
…
…
Taking out his cigarette box from his pocket, he pulled out a cigarette. Realizing smoking wasn’t allowed in the café, Jiang Wen took his things, paid, and went outside.
His mind in chaos, he aimlessly drove around the streets of Nan City for a while before parking near some plaza.
After silently smoking several cigarettes, he turned on the overhead light and picked up the papers from the passenger seat.
In the dim light, he made out the contents, and his hand trembled slightly, his breath catching.
On it was a familiar drunken peacock design, with a line of English below.
—apologizing to my little prince
Apologizing to my little prince.
My little prince.
Jiang Wen was slightly startled.
Several seconds later, his awareness returned.
He lowered the car window, tried to light his lighter several times but couldn’t get it to work.
Picking up the next sheet, it was something like a checklist. Written somewhat messily in the familiar handwriting of Feng Ning.
Jiang Wen looked at a few lines in a daze, suddenly enlightened.
Science Building ? (Arrived at noon, waited half an hour after classes. College students are much more modest than I imagined.)
North Two Library where you studied ? (I saw the pine and cypress at the entrance.)
West Three Cafeteria ? (I don’t have a student card, guess I won’t get to taste the sweet and sour pork.)
The track where you ran 1500 meters ? (I went for a run there yesterday too)
The Grand Hall was closed, couldn’t go in (I’ll look up pictures online later)
Lotus Pond ? (Too bad it’s not summer, couldn’t see the beautiful lotus flowers.
Oh right, I also went to your dormitory building. Looking from outside, it seemed quite run-down, could a pampered young master like you really live there?
Your university is quite big, I walked all day and feel like there are still many places I haven’t seen.
On the train back, I thought.
If I had known we wouldn’t last long, I should have been nicer to you.
Jiang Wen’s heart pounded.
Feng Ning had visited his university later?
With countless thoughts in his mind, he eagerly began reading the third sheet.
..
…
Actually, when I saw you on the bus that time, I wanted to turn around.
Were you following behind me afterward?
…
…
Summer is coming, I got my hair cut short.
The other day it rained, and I forgot to bring an umbrella again.
While crossing the street, while eating, for some reason I suddenly thought of you again.
….
….
I think I regret it a little
I should have tried to keep you
..
…
Four pieces of paper, so light they seemed weightless, but the fragmentary sentences hidden on them made them almost too heavy for Jiang Wen to hold.
A violent sourness filled his heart, something was collapsing. Jiang Wen felt like the whole world had emptied.
He sat there for a long while before numbly looking at the final sheet.
Slowly unfolding it.
This time, there was only one short line:
Jiang Wen, I’m sorry.
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