The news that Chen Yi was going abroad spread quickly within a small circle. Only then did Ruan Mian find out that the three boys closest to him were all in the know.
Once when Ruan Mian was accompanying Meng Xinglan to the liberal arts class to find Liang Yiran, Meng Xinglan mentioned this matter, still a bit surprised, “Wasn’t Chen Yi preparing for the competition? How come he’s going abroad now?”
“The school he applied to needs these awards to boost his application.”
Leaning against the railing, Liang Yiran reached out and pinched Meng Xinglan’s cheek, “Why do you care so much about him?”
Meng Xinglan pushed his hand away, wrinkling her nose, “I’m just curious, that’s all.”
Liang Yiran laughed, “He started preparing to study abroad a long time ago. I thought you would know since you’re in the same class.”
“We’re not close.”
Having said that, Meng Xinglan nudged Ruan Mian’s arm, trying to prove her innocence, “If you don’t believe me, ask Ruan Mian.”
Liang Yiran’s gaze shifted to the girl standing beside them. He didn’t know much about Ruan Mian, only that she was Meng Xinglan’s good friend and a science genius even more amazing than Chen Yi.
Now, looking at the girl who had clearly just returned to her senses, when their eyes met, he nodded and smiled, then said to Meng Xinglan again, “I still have something to do. Wait for me and we’ll go home together tonight.”
Meng Xinglan twisted her lips, “Fine, go take care of your things first.”
He nodded at Ruan Mian again. As he brushed past her, he reached out and ruffled Meng Xinglan’s bangs that she had carefully clipped for half an hour into a mess.
Meng Xinglan immediately bristled, yelling at his back, “Liang Yiran! What’s wrong with you!”
The boy didn’t stop, his figure tall and straight. He quickly disappeared at the end of the hallway. The evening breeze blew, unable to blow away the gentle smile in his eyes.
Meng Xinglan, still standing at the liberal arts classroom door, cursed while taking out a small mirror from her coat pocket, fixing her bangs.
Ruan Mian stood in the dusk. Among the coming and going figures, she finally realized that all her hard work and pursuit were useless efforts that others could never see.
No one would stay for her, carrying the nowhere-to-place teenage concerns, and then carefully placing them in his world.
All she had was the bitterness and sadness left after pouring out her unrequited love.
During that time, Ruan Mian was not doing well at all. Her nonchalance during the day would be magnified countless times at night, like having countless needles pricking her heart, causing an unbearable and sour ache.
At the end of October, the competition class entered an intensive training phase. Ruan Mian was immersed in test papers almost every day, trying to use this method to overwhelm those uncontrolled stray thoughts.
It was also because of this high-intensity studying that her grades in the competition class steadily held a vast lead in first place.
The teachers praised her every time. Her classmates used her as a role model. Even Chen Yi would occasionally give her some of the attention she had tried so hard to get from him in the past.
Ruan Mian felt like the heavens were playing a joke on her.
She had almost given up, yet a few words from him made ripples arise in her heart again. The feelings she had buried with her tears stealthily sprouted up once more.
Perseverance or giving up.
No matter which she chose, the hurt and sorrow were equal. Ruan Mian was caught in indecision, wavering unsteadily on the scales of Chen Yi.
That year was not a particularly good memory for Ruan Mian, and even the winter she normally disliked came especially early.
After October, Pingcheng entered a cold snap. Ruan Mian unfortunately caught a viral cold in the changing seasons. She took three days off to get IV fluids at the hospital.
It was also around this time that Fang Ruqing received a call from Xiping’s hometown. Zhou Xiujun had slipped and fallen while washing clothes by the lake that morning, injuring herself quite severely.
The local hospital’s medical facilities were lacking. They advised the family to send the elderly woman to a big hospital in the city as soon as possible. But because Ruan Mian’s aunt He Qin could not get in touch with Ruan Mingke, and the men of the family were all out working, she didn’t know anyone in Pingcheng. After careful consideration, she could only call Fang Ruqing for help to contact the hospital.
Fang Ruqing quickly had a friend arrange a hospital, and Zhou Xiujun was sent over around noon.
The body of the elderly was different from that of youths in their prime. After taking such a bad fall, the visible external injuries were not the biggest problem, but rather the damage to her bones.
After being admitted to the hospital, Zhou Xiujun underwent a full-body exam. Aside from fractures in her leg, the fall had also caused a lumbar compression fracture at L2, a rather severe situation. The hospital scheduled surgery that afternoon.
Ruan Mian waited right outside the operating room, getting IV fluids. Her physical discomfort and worry for her grandma made her look especially weak.
Fang Ruqing helped pull the thick coat draped over her shoulders up a bit, “Why not just get the IV in the ward. I’ll take you back over after grandma’s surgery ends.”
“It’s fine.”
She turned her head and coughed, “I’ll just sit here. There’s not much time left anyway.”
Fang Ruqing didn’t persuade her further. She turned and asked He Qin, “Is everything alright back home? Isn’t Ruan Jun taking the middle school entrance exam this year? Does he plan to take it in Pingcheng for high school?”
“Everything’s fine.”
He Qin forced a smile, “With his grades, it’d be good if he can test into the local high school in town. I don’t expect him to test into schools outside.”
Fang Ruqing chatted while keeping an eye on Ruan Mian’s IV and the operating room situation at the same time, busy going back and forth.
The surgery ended at 7:10pm. The doctor came out and said, “The surgery went very smoothly. Now we just need to wait for her to wake up from the anesthesia, then she can be moved to the ward.”
Ruan Mian heaved a long sigh of relief. Fang Ruqing told her to take her aunt downstairs to eat something while she stayed here waiting for Zhou Xiujun to come out.
There were many restaurants across from the hospital. Ruan Mian brought He Qin to a small eatery and ordered some hot dishes. After eating, she also packed a meal for Fang Ruqing.
He Qin stayed overnight at the hospital that evening to care for Zhou Xiujun. Ruan Mian wanted to stay too, but the ward only allowed one family member. Plus her health still hadn’t recovered, so she could only follow Fang Ruqing home.
Early next morning before 7am, Ruan Mian and Fang Ruqing went from home to the hospital. But Zhou Xiujun had fallen asleep again in the late night due to pain at the surgical site, so Ruan Mian didn’t get a chance to speak with her.
Afterwards, Fang Ruqing rented a room across from the hospital for He Qin. She took leave from work while Ruan Mian stayed alone in the ward.
The doctor came during rounds and gave some pointers about post-op recovery that Ruan Mian listened to carefully. After the doctor finished rounds, she sat by the bedside again.
Zhou Xiujun didn’t wake up until noon. Seeing her granddaughter keeping watch at her bedside, she revealed a feeble smile, “You look thinner again.”
“Do I? It’s probably because I haven’t had much of an appetite from feeling unwell recently.”
Ruan Mian held Zhou Xiujun’s hand, calling out softly, “Grandma…”
Zhou Xiujun knew she was worried and comforted her, “Grandma’s fine. Don’t worry, I just took a bad fall. I’ll recover after some rest.”
Ruan Mian held the old woman’s hand, unable to speak.
After looking around the room, Zhou Xiujun asked, “I heard your aunt say your mom paid the surgery fee in advance?”
“Mm.”
Ruan Mian said, “The situation was urgent at the time. Aunt didn’t have enough cash on hand, so my mom paid first.”
“We’ll have to pay her back.”
Zhou Xiujun sighed, “It was a lot of trouble for your mom too.”
Fang Ruqing and Ruan Mingke were divorced and she didn’t have much of a relationship with the Ruan family anymore. If not for Ruan Mian, there was no way today’s situation could have reached her.
Therefore, after Ruan Mian returned home that night, she went to the nearby ATM to withdraw 30,000 yuan1. She brought it to the hospital the next day to give to He Qin for repaying Fang Ruqing.
Fang Ruqing declined to take the money. Zhou Xiujun didn’t let her pay for subsequent expenses either. Everything was paid with Ruan Mian using the card Ruan Mingke gave her.
Zhou Xiujun stayed in the hospital for over half a month. After being discharged, she moved into the Nanhu Homes house. He Qin was unable to stay and care for her, so Fang Ruqing hired an auntie to help out at home.
After recovering from her illness, school matters took up most of Ruan Mian’s time. She could only squeeze out time on weekends to spend a day at Nanhu Homes.
The busy life didn’t leave her time to think about anything else.
And so the last month of 2009 quietly arrived before she knew it.
Pingcheng was bitterly cold in winter and scorching hot in summer. The long rainy season and the biting chill of winter that pierced you to the bone truly made it an unpleasant city to live in.
Monday morning, Ruan Mian dragged her exhausted body through the lingering morning mist into campus, moving slowly. Meng Xinglan ran up behind her, half leaning on her, full of energy in her voice, “It’s soooo cold, soooo cold, soooo cold, I’m definitely going to a city without winter for college.”
Ruan Mian lazily laughed, “Go to Haicheng then, it’s like summer there all year round.”
“No way, too hot is no good either.”
Meng Xinglan retracted her hands into her pockets, breathing out white puffs, “You guys have your exam next month right?”
“Yup, the 10th next month.”
Ruan Mian yawned deeply, looking extremely drowsy.
“How late have you been sleeping recently?”
“Past 2am.”
“Such dedication.”
Meng Xinglan clicked her tongue, “With the effort you and Chen Yi are putting in now, you’d be letting yourselves down if you don’t win a prize.”
Ruan Mian’s eyelid twitched, and her smile faded somewhat.
In the competition class, she and Chen Yi’s grades were almost always first and second place. This also made them a main focus for the teachers to groom.
Whether it was psychological counseling or anything else, the teachers would automatically pair them up. The two originally didn’t interact much, but were strangely spending more time together recently.
If this was in the past, before Ruan Mian found out Chen Yi was preparing to study abroad, this would undoubtedly have been a joyous matter to her.
But now there was mostly heartache.
Ruan Mian had chosen physics for the competition class because of him, imagining that one day she would be noticed by him. But the Ruan Mian back then never imagined that when this day truly arrived, it would be so sad and regretful.
She only saw things from her narrow perspective, thinking he was a fish in the pond, not realizing he was an eagle soaring between heaven and earth. After she recklessly charged in disregarding everything, he spread his wings and flew away to a place farther than her world, to an even more distant land.
- About $4500 USD. Healthcare costs in China are relatively low compared to Western countries, but paying out of pocket can still be a huge burden for lower income families. ↩︎
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