There used to be a popular saying online: “If someone appears in your dream, you should go see them when you wake up.” Fu Xueli always thought this saying was rather unconventional, but for some reason, she kept thinking about it today. Once the thought arose, even the magazine shots felt off.
Her partner for the shoot was a popular young male celebrity, with delicate features and an androgynous style, popular among female fans. He liked to put on airs in private, which wasn’t Fu Xueli’s type, but young girls nowadays seemed to like it.
At the moment, the young star was holding a guitar, strumming the strings with amateur skill. His oval face wore a standard look of tender affection, but the heavy makeup appeared greasy under the strong lights.
Fu Xueli sat opposite him in a chair, feeling unexpectedly nauseated and uncomfortable. She tilted her chin up slightly, averting her eyes.
Nearby, the CO2 spray machine was hissing out white mist, and the studio’s flash lights were blinking. Assistants stood by with water and coats. Makeup artists waited for a break to touch up their makeup.
The photographer, Jony, knelt on the ground in low-rise leather pants, holding the camera with one hand and waving the other vertically, signaling the two to move closer. He joked, “Little Pear1, sweeten your expression a bit, okay? Relax, relax. Let’s find that feeling of being in love, alright? Your expression looks like you’re facing an enemy.”
Fu Xueli smiled apologetically. She had started as a model, so even though she wasn’t in the right mood, she could reflexively show the feeling Jony wanted to capture on camera.
Click— Click—
Her mind kept wandering… It kept wandering… This distraction continued until she finished rehearsing the opening dance for a variety show, and then stopped at the entrance of the police station.
None of that mattered. The point was, she didn’t even know why she came here… She had even skipped a dinner appointment to sneak out alone.
She couldn’t even remember the lines for the variety show opening that was about to be recorded, yet she had the time to come here.
After a while, Fu Xueli remembered she hadn’t called Xu Xingchun.
She didn’t know what had gotten into her today, but after having a dream, the urge to see Xu Xingchun grew stronger.
She didn’t even know if he was at work today. They had just met a few days ago, and the familiar building was right in front of her, but she couldn’t take that step forward.
The security guard in the small white booth at the entrance had been watching Fu Xueli for a long time. He even opened the window to shout at her not to loiter in front of the police station. She was wearing a mask, a black baseball cap, and a long coat that covered her from neck to ankle, looking very suspicious and behaving strangely.
After pacing back and forth a few more times, Fu Xueli stepped onto the stairs on one side and started counting her jumps.
Go… Don’t go. Go… Still don’t go. Should she fucking go or not?! Damn it. Well, she’s already here…
Frustrated, she pulled off her mask and took out a lipstick from her pocket. A white Audi seemed to have been parked by the roadside for a long time. She looked around, making sure there were no passersby, then leaned over to the car’s side mirror. She slightly opened her mouth and carefully touched up her makeup.
Just as she finished applying lipstick to her lower lip, the car window suddenly rolled down, revealing the owner’s face, startling her and making her hand shake.
Xu Xingchun sat in the driver’s seat, one hand still on the steering wheel, his face expressionless as he met her eyes. The atmosphere was so awkward it made one’s heart race.
Fu Xueli had excellent psychological resilience and thick skin. After just a second of stiffness, she straightened up nonchalantly and pressed her lips together to even out the lipstick.
After standing steady, she tilted her head deliberately, slowly screwed the lipstick closed, and put the cap back on. The whole process was incredibly calm, as if nothing had happened.
Long ago, her cousin Fu Chenglin had told her that when you’re embarrassed, the most important thing is to keep a straight face so others can’t tell you’re embarrassed.
If you’re calmer than anyone else, you win.
So Fu Xueli leisurely took out a tissue, pulled one out, bent down again, and used the mirror to smooth her hair while wiping the lipstick marks around her lips.
Throughout this process, Xu Xingchun didn’t say a word.
She lowered her eyelids slightly, her gaze sliding from his neck to his Adam’s apple, then asked, “This is by the roadside. Aren’t you parked illegally?”
“……”
“Aren’t you going to let me in the car?” Knowing he wouldn’t invite her, she had to ask directly.
Xu Xingchun ignored her, just sitting in the car with a cold gaze, not answering. He was still wearing his work clothes today, a minimalist white coat with a black sweater underneath, and a clean, neat white shirt peeking out from the collar. He had the handsome and steady look of a mature man, with no accessories except for a silver mechanical watch on his wrist.
Fine.
What goes around comes around, what’s the big deal?
Can’t I just endure it?
Thinking this, Fu Xueli held back her anger, walked around in a circle, and went to the passenger side to open the door. After pulling a few times and finding it locked, she lost her temper and yanked the handle repeatedly, her wrist shaking with her body.
She used so much force that the door was almost pulled off, but it still wouldn’t open.
After waiting a while, there was no sign of the car unlocking. She walked back around to stand in front of Xu Xingchun, her chest heaving with anger. Her hair tips were recently dyed a dark green, and with her big movements, her ponytail swung in an arc from behind her back to her shoulder. “Xu Xingchun, what do you mean by this?”
Does he really think he’s such a big shot?
Anger makes people lose their rationality. Fu Xueli suddenly took off the baseball cap that was blocking her vision, slightly raising her chin. Even though she was bending over, she still had that looking-down-on-people air, like a proud white swan.
After a brief silence, Xu Xingchun still didn’t soften. He just asked slowly, almost pausing between each word, “What are you doing here?”
Whether it was because too much time had passed, this was the first time she felt it was so difficult to communicate with Xu Xingchun. After thinking for a long time, she finally came up with a lame excuse, “I’m not doing anything, I just wanted to catch up with you, is that okay?”
Xu Xingchun’s lips were tightly closed as he turned his head, moving his gaze away from her. His whole body was screaming “refuse to communicate.”
In front of Xu Xingchun, she had long been accustomed to being the accommodating party. Come to think of it, Fu Xueli had never been so humble and cautious in front of anyone else.
She really disliked this feeling of humiliating herself, yet she couldn’t control it. However, even after lowering herself to speak like this, carefully weighing each word with trepidation, Xu Xingchun remained unmoved.
Fu Xueli forced a smile, her hand silently clenching, “At least we’re still friends, right?”
Xu Xingchun stared straight ahead, his gaze indifferent, the profile of his face clean-cut, exuding a sense of cold detachment.
Yes. Long ago, Fu Xueli had vaguely sensed that Xu Xingchun was far from as harmless as he appeared on the surface. He was particularly good at enduring, usually pretending to be like normal people, but in fact, he was extremely sensitive, holding grudges deep down, and had no sympathy for unimportant people.
Just like now.
No matter how embarrassing it was for her to keep trying to warm up to his cold attitude, he didn’t show any emotion.
It’s really fair, isn’t it? Xu Xingchun is now truly experiencing bitterness before sweetness, is he trying to get back all the frustration he suffered before?
Fu Xueli’s inner turmoil grew, and she swallowed the words she had prepared. The small flame in her chest suddenly flared up, and she threw the crumpled tissue she had been holding at him, hitting him squarely on the head.
The paper ball bounced a few times before falling from his head to his knee.
Fu Xueli stared at him intently, persisting: “Are you afraid of me? Why else are you hiding?”
“This is not a place you should come to.” Xu Xingchun looked straight ahead, his hand gripping the steering wheel, knuckles turning white. The car window slowly rolled up, and the car made a starting sound.
Fu Xueli was almost infuriated to the point of fainting. Her angry shout rang out on the street:
“Go ahead, if you dare to leave today, then you should never—”
As the car slowly moved away, the red taillights lit up. She watched helplessly as the words “see me” got stuck in her throat. The barrier at the police station entrance slowly rose, and the white Audi turned the corner, gradually speeding up and disappearing from view.
So, does this mean Xu Xingchun hates her now?
……
Fu Xueli stood by the roadside, cars coming and going, taking a long time to come back to her senses. She gritted her teeth and clenched her phone, taking a deep breath, furious.
She should have just kicked his car with her high heels and walked away!
It would have been better if she had kicked a hole in it!
She must have been kicked in the head by a donkey to come looking for him!
—
The light on the dissection table was stark white. Old Qin washed his hands and put on a pair of rubber gloves from the operating table.
Old Qin had once been the head of the criminal police team in a prefecture-level city, but was later transferred up. He had over a decade of frontline work experience. But as he got older, he stepped back to a secondary role. Usually, he took it easy, generally not doing much work, just reporting to the leaders and occasionally helping the younger colleagues solve problems.
Hearing footsteps behind him, Xu Xingchun closed his fingers, putting whatever was in his palm into his pocket.
“What clues are you studying so intently from a piece of tissue?” Old Qin had sharp eyes and had seen what was in his hand earlier, half-jokingly.
Xu Xingchun leaned forward slightly, his hand holding the scalpel paused for only a few seconds, without saying anything.
“You’ve been busy lately, haven’t you? Quite a few cases?” Old Qin found a chair and sat down.
“It’s alright.”
“When do you plan to go back?”
Xu Xingchun shook his head.
Seeing his reticence, Old Qin didn’t ask further. He understood that even if the leaders came now, Xu Xingchun probably wouldn’t need to report his whereabouts.
As Xu Xingchun worked silently, Old Qin casually mentioned, “I’ve been hearing quite a bit of gossip lately. People, when they’re too emotional, easily lose accurate judgment. So… especially for you now, with such heavy responsibilities, it’s necessary to downplay your personal feelings for work. It’s also a kind of physiological and psychological defense mechanism.”
“Take care of your health, Captain Xu. Your smoking frequency has been quite high lately.” Old Qin said meaningfully.
- Nickname for Xueli (??), which also means yellow pear/snow pear. ↩︎
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