ATLAS TRANSLATES

Actually, twenty years ago, my dad and my biological father Mo Qian had acquired more than a dozen newspapers and magazines because of my mother, so both the Mo family and the Xiao family had a certain amount of media power, not to mention the expansion over the past decade or so which was not to be underestimated.

It is said that if three people say there’s a tiger, it becomes true. In fact, sometimes just using a little bit of media power, if enough people say it, the direction of public opinion can be changed. However, apart from the ridiculously fake news early on saying that Gu Xiao’an was the illegitimate child of Fang Dingyue and me, which my cousin made some small moves about, for the other gossip, everyone consistently remained silent. And a lot of that gossip wasn’t cooked up by us, much of it was the media’s own fantasizing, because to some extent it fulfilled the wishes in the hearts of many viewers and fans. So most of the time, we chose to keep quiet.

Dad even said, “It’s better to have people talking about you than ignoring you!” which made me feel at a loss with a dad like this.

But Fu Junyan basically had no gossip, except for occasionally being involved with me. His news was incredibly sparse and incredibly clean. I even suspected his management company from the beginning wanted to push him to international stardom, to an incomparable height.

That day when Fu Junyan went to attend a famous designer’s fashion show, I saw in the entertainment news footage, he just turned his head slightly and smiled, and the silent venue erupted into exclamations and applause. The female host said, “This man will drive people crazy…”

There were some roles I had taken in my previous life that I was unwilling to act in again in this life. Although I could perform them better, there was no point. The opportunity to collaborate with Jay was also cleanly dealt with as a result of this decision. Wan Qing was a bit unhappy, saying some of the roles were very suitable for me, so why wasn’t I cooperating?

I said, “I hope my roles can be diverse. Look at how carefully Fu Junyan chooses his films, right?”

But she completely disagreed, saying with a straight face, “Xiao’ai, there’s a saying that you should strike while the iron is hot. For example, you could take advantage of the current momentum to act in a few more TV dramas and some movies to break into the big screen. With greater influence, even if you don’t film anything for a year and have no works, just doing some fashion shoots would be enough.”

I shook my head, only thinking of Fu Junyan, and said, “That’s a celebrity, not an actor.”

Hearing my words, Wan Qing moved her lips, seeming to have more to say, but in the end only started speaking in a deflated tone, “Think it over carefully yourself.”

During this time, I began paying attention to the recent movements of international renowned director Huai’an. If my memory served me right, he would soon begin large-scale casting for his comeback film.

In my previous life, Huai’an’s film caused a huge stir, not because it ended up having great box office success or popularity, but because the film suddenly came to an abrupt end. When the film was fully shut down in my past life, at the press conference, Director Huai’an only said one thing. He said, “The actors are not ideal, I’m unwilling to let the story down.” And I learned through the grapevine that it was a period film, but of course I had no idea about the specific content. I was just extremely curious about this story that suddenly stopped – just what kind of story could make a director abandon filming because the actors were not ideal?

So I told Wan Qing to please closely monitor Director Huai’an’s recent movements. Upon hearing this, she asked me in great surprise, “Xiao’ai, Director Huai’an went abroad long ago, he hasn’t made a film in several years!”

I just smiled and urged her to pay close attention. Wan Qing also seemed to understand and nodded seriously. But after a long while, she suddenly asked me, “Did the boss tell you the news that Director Huai’an is making a comeback?”

I paused for a moment, then looked at her and nodded.

Fu Junyan got busy again, beginning costume fittings for his new film. Thinking of him collaborating with Ji Jie’er made me uncomfortable all over. I had privately read the script outline for that film of his, and the role Ji Jie’er played was indeed an innocent, kind-hearted angelic character. Maybe it was because I disliked her that I felt irritated seeing her, inwardly scoffing several times. I wondered how the audience and fans didn’t get tired of Ji Jie’er playing pure and innocent little princesses ever since her debut. But then I thought of myself in my previous life – in the first few years after my debut, the roles I played were also all similarly decorative roles, and couldn’t help secretly sticking out my tongue.

Perhaps out of spite, perhaps to prove there is no such thing as 100% pure goodness in this world, or perhaps I indeed wanted to break out of my comfort zone, I took on a film called “Black Cinderella”. It was a very thought-provoking story.

In the story, the kind and brave Cinderella was not as simple as she appeared on the surface. In front of everyone, she was the well-behaved child, but she was also the bad girl who feared her father’s love and family would be snatched away by her stepmother and stepsister, so she schemed and struggled at the bottom. Inside everyone is a bad child and a good child. The role I took this time was undoubtedly a very complex character with an internal battle between good and evil. This role was said to be difficult to portray, as the actress needed to fully express Cinderella’s conflicted and complex psychological changes through body language, eyes, and facial expressions.

I showed Fu Junyan the story outline that had not yet been finalized. He said, “This role seems very easy, but to act it well requires depth.”

I thought for a bit and said to him pointedly, “Dad told me since I was young, in this world there is no such thing as 100% pure goodness. Pure goodness cannot survive in this world. If a person has lived in this world for over 20 years and still appears so pristinely flawless, then either they are an autistic fool, or they are a hypocritical fake.”

“Xiao’ai, then in your opinion, what is the right way to live in this world?”

“Huh?” I was taken aback by his question. Lowering my head, I said in a small voice while fiddling with my fingers, “Living like you is really good…”

“That’s not so great.” He shook his head, ruffled my hair, and seeing my dumbfounded expression, he hooked the corner of his mouth and tapped my nose. “You really are a silly pufferfish!”

“Hmph! I complimented you but you call me silly!”

“That’s why I say you’re silly. Silly pufferfish, I’m not as good as you think, no one can be that good…”

You’re already good enough…

Because of you, my love that I waited ten years for but ended in nothing, all the wounds it inflicted were gently smoothed over by you. When I see Jay, I no longer feel sad and want to cry, I no longer resent the unfairness of the heavens. I’m actually able to calmly face all this and no longer be depressed. I never imagined I could feel this free. It’s just that I can’t say these words to you directly.

Thinking of this, for the first time, I took the initiative to hug his waist and lean against his chest, listening to his strong heartbeat. With my eyes closed, I said, “You’re so good that I don’t know what to do anymore…” I don’t know why I wanted to say these words, but I said, “Since I was young, I thought, if I fell in love with a man, no matter who he was, as long as he took my hand, as long as he was willing, I would follow him to the ends of the earth. It wouldn’t matter if he was bad to the whole world, it wouldn’t matter even if he committed all manner of evil deeds. Even if the whole world turned its back on him, as long as he was willing, I would stay by his side. High or low, as long as he was willing…”

I clearly felt his chest tremble, then heard him sigh. He said, “Silly girl…”

I really didn’t expect to run into Fang Dingyue when signing the contract for my new drama. When he and the director walked out of the conference room one after the other, I was truly stunned for a moment.

Then Fang Dingyue also saw me. His usually cold eyes instantly lit up with a smile as he extended his hand and said, “Xiao’ai, I’m very happy to collaborate with you again.”

I dazedly reached out my hand, only able to stammer out after a long while, “No way! Dingyue, don’t tell me you’re the male lead!”

“Of course I am!” He raised his eyebrows, the coldness around him intensifying. He said, “Xiao’ai, your expression really hurts my feelings…”

I looked at him with a bitter face and blurted out what was on my mind, “Are you kidding me? Don’t mess with people like this. Why do I have to pine after you again!”

Hearing this, he raised his eyebrows and burst out laughing.

The Golden Dragon Awards ceremony was just two weeks away. Wan Qing was very concerned about my outfit for attending the Golden Dragon Awards, personally taking charge of every little detail. She was a big-name agent. Before taking me on, she had seven or eight artists in her hands and her income was not low. But now she only managed me, so her income was obviously lower. And I definitely wouldn’t listen to her as much as other people. Moreover, she often took care of An’an for me, so I felt a bit guilty and wanted to ask my cousin to give her a raise.

Who knew when my cousin heard my words, he said, “How could I possibly mistreat her? Her money has only increased, not decreased. Her year-end bonus will also be doubled. You don’t need to worry about this. I’m your cousin, aren’t I?”

I shook my head on the other end of the phone and said with utmost seriousness after hearing his words, “You’re not my cousin, you’re my real brother!”

“Alright then. Then tell your bro, who exactly is your real sweetheart?”

“Ha, in your dreams!” I smugly snapped my phone shut. In my previous life, this guy kept his girlfriend a secret from everyone. I wouldn’t bother with this rascal.

When Fu Junyan told me he had to go to Mexico, I was holding Gu Xiao’an and reading “The Little Prince” to him: “The fox looked at the Little Prince’s wheat-colored hair and said, ‘Please tame me…’”

I coaxed An’an to sleep before turning to look at him. In the dim light, Fu Junyan was just leaning against the door frame, his luggage already packed beside him. He tilted his head and calmly watched me. Even after waiting so long, he didn’t look impatient at all, his face wearing his usual unhurried expression.

I asked, “How long will you be gone?”

He remained silent.

I suddenly felt like my tone sounded like a wife having a tiff with her husband, and felt flustered inside. I calmed down a bit before asking again, “Fu Junyan, aren’t you going to attend the Golden Dragon Awards ceremony? You have two nominations.”

“When will filming start for your new movie with Ji Jie’er?” You should be back by then, right…

“When are you leaving? I’ll see you off.” Heaven knows when you’ll pop out again out of the blue next time.

He just silently looked at me like that. After a long while, he said, “Remember to make yourself a cup of milk every morning. Even if An’an is at kindergarten and you’re alone, you need to eat well. If you get tired from holding An’an, put him down, don’t force yourself. Xiao Qi can carry him on his back too. Also, don’t be so careless and keep eating Xiao Qi’s cookies.” Then he walked over and gently caressed An’an’s little face before caressing my eyes and saying, “If you’re tired, call me. I’ll come back as soon as I can to accompany you to the Golden Dragon Awards. Okay?”

I felt my nose sour and buried my head in his chest, saying, “Fu Junyan, do you know how annoying you are?”

“Mm.” With his chin resting on my head, he continued to smile gently and said, “Silly pufferfish, I know.”

Then he added, “Don’t hide your temper from me. However you are is good. Being real is the best.”

That night, I hazily recalled the words a female celebrity said when we were on a talk show together in my previous life.

She said, “What kind of man is the best? It’s not about how rich, handsome, or tough he is. It’s that even if you throw tantrums, even if you’re bare-faced, sickly, injured, even if you’re huffing and puffing with no trace of feminine gentleness, even if you’re hurt to the point you can’t bear to look at yourself, wrapped up like a mummy with a stiff smile, even if you drool all over your pillow at night, disheveled and disgusting… But he still stays by your side, he still loves you. This kind of man, he loves your dazzling brilliance in the limelight, and also loves you with your makeup washed off behind the scenes. Just because you know he’s there, you’ll always feel secure no matter what.” And in that moment, for some reason, I firmly believed Fu Junyan was that kind of man.

The next day, I took the initiative to drive Fu Junyan to the airport. He asked, “Xiao’ai, what gift do you want?”

I tapped the steering wheel and said, “How about when you come back, you personally win a Golden Dragon Award for Best Actor and give it to me!”

In my previous life, Fu Junyan did not star in “Regretful Love”. Although he acted extremely well this time, even my usually picky dad had no complaints about his performance. But I really didn’t know what award he could win, because in my previous life he wasn’t even in the running, right? But I also knew in my heart, his arrival would change many things.

Hearing my words, Fu Junyan glanced at me but didn’t say anything. He was very steady in his actions, not an arrogant or showy person. Unlike me, who sometimes had a fiery temper even after making a huge scene. Seeing his reaction, I also felt my words were a bit off and could only tug my lips into a smile and obediently focus on driving.

Perhaps because of that car accident, I drove much more carefully and obviously slower than before. Once I asked Fu Junyan, “I’m driving so slowly, aren’t you annoyed?”

But he said, “It’s good for girls to drive a bit slower.”

When we arrived at the airport and got out of the car, we both put on the sunglasses we had prepared in advance. Putting on my hat, I turned my head and saw Fu Junyan. I was stunned for a moment before finally saying, “Fu Junyan, do you have to look this good? I feel like you wearing sunglasses is just another way of showing off! Isn’t it?”

Hearing this, he just pointed at the rearview mirror, signaling for me to look at myself. Then he said, “Xiao’ai, you’re not much better…”

Later, as I followed behind Fu Junyan out of the parking lot, I asked him, “Fu Junyan, are we discreetly complimenting each other?”

He turned around, took off my hat, ruffled my hair, then carefully put it back on for me. Slow on the uptake, I only realized after a while that his action counted as tacit agreement. He really was disgustingly discreet…